Robert F. Funke

“Robert,
Thank you for braving the unmitigated lunacy of Ginuwine’s Christmas album and reporting your discoveries back to the rest of us. After reading your Ginuwine Advent series, my first reaction was to create a fake email account, masquerade as Ginuwine, and submit essays in defense of this album. And then I watched the music video for Pony. As I delved deeper into the arcane bizarro world of Ginuwine’s discography, I realized that I could conceive of no rational argument capable of justifying the creation of any of Ginuwine’s music (either Christmas or non-seasonal). My first plan having failed, I thought that I might simply compose an expletive-ridden rant from Ginuwine and send that to you instead, but I found the entire corpus of Ginuwine’s work to be so preposterous that I doubted my ability to accomplish even that. As this was my first encounter with Ginuwine’s material, I suspect that my creative faculties were simply overwhelmed by my own incredulity that something like this could possibly exist. Thank you again for your efforts on the front lines. I think I speak for your entire readership when I say that we eagerly look forward to the next installments in this series.
Lucas.”