Robert F. Funke

Robert’s thoughts:

You know what’s coming, because it’s a Christmas standard. “Joy to the World.”

But you also know, when the Lakers are announcing their starting lineup, that Kobe Bryant is gonna be in there. But they amp it up anyway. That’s how this song opens, kind of letting the tension build for what you know is going to be a pretty painful slaughtering of a Christmas hymn.

When the lyrics start, Ginuwine opts to keep the original melody, but tricks out the beat to the point that, for the second time on the album, it’s kind of sounded like Dirty Projectors. Kudos, Gin.

Ginuwine says the word “heart” like “ho-wuht” and it’s pretty great.

Oh, earlier when I said that he keeps the original melody? That hasn’t happened. He sings the first verse. Then he sings it again in his own stupid way. Then he sings the second verse normal. Then in his own stupid way. etc.

What’s kind of nice is that after “I Love Christmas,” the best-titled and best-executed song on the album, which was simple, Ginuwine blows up your speakerboxes with some lasers and stuff.

I think my brain is trying to flee my skull through my nostrils.

JP’s thoughts:

If you’ve ever thought to yourself, “I like Joy To The World, but I think it’d be way better with a trance beat!”, this song is for you.