Robert F. Funke

At the end of their journey, the wise men had the baby Jesus, savior of the world, an infant king. We have “Switch It Up.” Let’s get to it, shall we?

Robert’s thoughts:

Maybe it’s Stockholm Syndrome, but I think this is the fattest beat on the record so far. Off the heels of Christmas Eve’s miserable track, it’s nice to hear Ginuwine being cocky towards women he wants to hug and kiss on, rather than WHATEVER EMOTION he was trying to pull with that national tragedy of an R&B joint.

I think you need to getcha getcha mind right before I… (switch it) switch it up… look for your replacement…

It’s hard to step away from your family on Christmas morning to listen to a song that seems to be about jettisoning a lover who isn’t cutting the mustard.

Okay, we’re halfway through, and still nothing even slightly Christmas-related.

I think Ginuwine is giving just a Ginuwine gift here. I think the idea is that it’s Christmas, and so he’s just going to give me a Christmas song about how he’s changing the game and dumping girls? I have no idea.

There’s a lyric in the chorus that I’m not getting.

Switch it switch it switch it up / look for your replacement / find me [SOMETHING]

I think it’s “find me a new Matrix,” as in, Ginuwine has been living in his Ginuwine world to the point that nothing feels real (un-Ginuwine), and he’s ready to pull the plug on his reality and wake up in a pod of synthetic embryonic fluid and destroy the harvesting robot that wants to use him as a battery.

MERRY CHRISTMAS! Your present’s at the bottom.

JP’s thoughts:

Uggghghghgghhhhh. Ginuwine ruined Christmas.